What else do you want to know about?” At this age, kids might be fascinated with bodies and the concept of sex, but they usually just think it’s weird or gross. For example, if they ask what the word sex means, you can say something like: “Sometimes when two grownups like each other, they want to kiss and touch each other’s bodies - especially their penis or vulva. You can answer their questions honestly while still explaining that sex is something only grownups do. In fact, research shows that children who talk with their parents and know more about this stuff are more likely to wait to have sex until they’re older and use birth control/condoms when they eventually do have sex. Giving your kids age-appropriate information about sexuality won’t encourage unhealthy sexual development. Talking with your kids about sexuality isn’t going to make them have sex earlier. To figure out what they’re really asking, you can say, “That’s a great question, what made you think of that?” or “Can you tell me what you already know about that?” or “What do you think the answer is?” What seems like a straightforward question to adults could be different than what your kid actually wants to know.įor example, a child who asks, “Why do I have a penis?” might be wondering about why touching it feels good, or why their body looks different from their sister’s, or what part the penis plays in reproduction. One way to guide the conversation is to find out what your child already knows or thinks, and what they’re really trying to find out. With younger kids, less is better - start with the simplest explanation, and only give them more details if they have other questions or seem really interested in what you’re talking about. They need answers, but they don’t always need all the details. It’s important to be honest, accurate, and frank when answering your kids’ questions about sex, but that doesn’t mean you need to overwhelm them with lots of information. There are many ways to start conversations about sex and sexuality, and it gets easier with time and practice. Talking with kids about sexuality helps keep them healthy and makes your relationship stronger.
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